It has been a while since I read the book, do they give a reason for step 1? Because it feels like there is only one possible answer to that question, which makes it feel a weird to me now.
Yes: practically, it just might not be a good time, and emotionally, it prepares the person to accept the feedback. Less so in the book, but definitely on the podcast, they really emphasize that the question is genuine; if someone says no to the question, then you accept the no and move on.
They also emphasize that you should give /only/ positive feedback for quite some time before starting to give negative feedback. That would probably go a long way to soften things enough that one feels they can say no when appropriate.
(There's a whole set of things to do if the direct /always/ says no, of course)
