I also find these very blunt - this is what I would say if the person I was exerting my authority and the person I was talking to really had no choice, but I was being polite about it.
I would soften them a lot if I wasn't in a position of authority, or if I wanted to genuinely engage with that person.
Also in any case, I would say precisely what it was about:
"Can I give you feedback about X?" so that it doesn't induce anxiety and the person has a realistic idea of what they are being asked before they decide,
and,
"[You're doing good work, and] it would be better if you did Y" to reiterate and reinforce the goal.
> Can you change that?
I also find these very blunt - this is what I would say if the person I was exerting my authority and the person I was talking to really had no choice, but I was being polite about it.
I would soften them a lot if I wasn't in a position of authority, or if I wanted to genuinely engage with that person.
Also in any case, I would say precisely what it was about:
"Can I give you feedback about X?" so that it doesn't induce anxiety and the person has a realistic idea of what they are being asked before they decide, and,
"[You're doing good work, and] it would be better if you did Y" to reiterate and reinforce the goal.